The Modern Condition of the Loathsomeness of Corn Hole

I recently heard of this game Called “Corn Hole”. It was touted as being one of my friend’s favorite games here at Cedarville. After playing it for the first time a few days ago, I was speechless. Now, those of you that know me… know that I’m rarely speechless. I talk a lot. Anyways. Doug Had an epiphany after playing Corn Hole: I don’t understand WHAT your parents did to you Midwest children for you to like that game. You throw. Bean bags. At a board. With a Hole in it. And You call it Fun. What is wrong with you?
It’s not just that. Corn Hole has weaved itself into the fabric of sophisticated Midwest Society: Deeper than I ever thought possible. I was on facebook the other day Minding my own business when I saw it. An ad. A Normal, Boring Internet ad. It was doing its normal thing: Trying to sell you something. But, usually it’s some dating service… Or some musician, or fat loss program. NO. To my Horror it was for this:

bigtimegameboards.com makes Professional Corn Hole Sets. For ONLY $80-$145 you too can have a Corn Hole game Set! How freaking amazing.

You People Are Weird.